We are a couple of years away from the empty nest, which has started me thinking about how to configure our home for the next chapter of our lives. To be clear, this is a recreational activity for me, not a stressor. I like to spend time envisioning the future, thinking about the different variations it might manifest as, and …
Reconsidering The House We Raised Our Family In
Our oldest will graduate high school this year, and our youngest will leave the nest a couple of years later. Having kids grow up and leave provides an opportunity to reflect on many decisions we made when we had just started our family and purchased a home. This is my assessment of what worked, what didn’t and what we might …
You Never Step In The Same River Twice
The title comes from a favorite saying from a long-time reader back in the day, and I recalled it for a couple of reasons. First, I learned that a favorite coffee house I used to frequent as a med student had shuttered back in 2022. It was a place where Robin Williams had once been spotted grabbing a pick me …
Thank You Note For Kenya
Dear A, In 2002, I was a resident in Emergency Medicine finishing up my training at XXXX. I’d arranged through one of our part-time faculty to rotate through the Nairobi Hospital for about 6 weeks. When my sister mentioned to a friend that I was heading to Nairobi, her friend noted that her older brother’s good friend was working there …
Thank You Note
[Some time ago, I came across the recommendation to write thank you letters on a regular basis as part of a gratitude practice. What follows is my first attempt.] Dear E, If you are receiving this, it probably took a few minutes of amateur internet sleuthing to track you down. Let’s get a few things straight out of the gate …
The Loss Of Social Witness
The headline of a throwaway article on my newsfeed recently drew my attention to a topic that I’d not considered before. It proclaimed that part of the boredom that besets some retirees comes from the loss of an audience. Not just any audience, mind you – it’s about being seen to do things that matter by people who matter. Feeling …
As Close As I Can Get
My father died almost two-and-a-half years ago. I think of him every day. It began as a profound sadness, an absence that made me feel deficient mixed with a tinge of relief that he was finished suffering. It was a good death, and it was the right time in the trajectory of his illness. Any longer and he would have …
Defined Contribution
Since our eldest was accepted to university, I’ve spent a bit of time thinking ahead about what life could be like in this next phase. I’m trying to incorporate wisdom from the excellent book Designing Your Life, by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans, where they advocate exploring a transition to a new activity or role gradually to determine whether the …
New Friends
Today one of the strategy gamer dads from my inner tier of friends surprised me by gifting me a subscription to an online board game platform. It was an act of spontaneous generosity from someone who knows me well enough to know I wouldn’t buy it for myself. We met when his family moved to our area 9 years ago, …
Espresso Spoons
Through a serendipitous series of events, I was invited to a book club that explores what’s next – a group of fifty-somethings figuring out their next act after kids leave, the divorce is finalized, or your life trajectory’s resemblance to your parents’ less than ideal narrative becomes too strong to ignore any longer. The group included an accomplished academic, a …