I think it was my wife who introduced me to a uniquely useful definition of aging: accepting the formerly intolerable.
This phrase was front and center in my mind as I went through a recent roller coaster ride on a real estate deal, one where each new twist and turn revealed an additional cost, a worse than anticipated interest rate, a multitude of further recommended inspections each of which seemed equally likely to result in a new problem to remedy.
It was biblical bordering on comical: the general inspection begat the termite inspection begat the roofing inspection...
The breaking point came when the inspector uttered a dreaded four letter word: mold.
Mold investigation is a black box that makes Pandora's receptacle seem dull. The only person who has sufficient expertise in ascertaining the severity of disease is the mold inspector, who works separately from the crew that offers the bid on remedying the damage.
Mold strikes fear in the heart of both seller and buyer because it can become a neverending mystery hole into which one or both parties pour their money.
As a physician, all I could think of was the chest x-rays from med school showing large cavitary lesions typical of aspergillus fumigatus (fungus balls are gnarly).
When mold was discovered, I asked the seller to offer credits in the amount of the bid that would be required to remedy what was found.
There was understandable ambivalence on the seller's part until he saw the formal report and understood the scope of damage.
Something in the pace of our accelerated transaction changed at this moment. It was the realization that I had bent over backward so far to accommodate the seller's requests that I had become a virtual contortionist.
I had invested such time, energy and capital in the deal, I was on the verge of accepting the formerly intolerable.
It took a discussion with my wife to realize it had reached a point of excessive compromise. The writing had been on the wall all along, but I'd refused to see it.
We cut our losses and withdrew from the deal.
An expensive education, but most worthwhile lessons cost you dearly in one currency or another.
Dreams of real estate, you'll have to wait for another opportunity.
The right opportunity.
[Sigh.]