This decade of life has revolved around coming to terms with betrayals of the body. Following the first year of the pandemic, I sold my both my beloved surf kayak as well as my stashed in bushes on the beach workout kayak because the lifting and loading was taking a toll on my back. In comparison to many people I …
A Good Week Defined
Last Sunday, I flash-froze my gonads in the Pacific during a modest swell, and while it was not the most comfortable experience in the water, there were several good rides on my bodyboard and the camaraderie of the blue-lipped surfer in the lineup, the only other person willing to paddle out at dawn on this particular winter day. Monday morning …
New Shoots, Dead Branches
My son and I took a road trip to visit the home I grew up in this past weekend for a celebration with family. My youngest sister is due to deliver her first child, and she and her husband recently moved back to my home town to have more support in place. Over a year after the loss of my …
Hardship Is Relative
Back pain led me to sell my beloved surf kayak that first summer of COVID. Ever since, I’ve been riding a bicycle nearly every day I’m not working. It was hard to give up the kayak. It led me to accept that my body will have different activities it can tolerate at different stages. Understanding that everything is by its …
Lessons In Impermanence
When I was 17, just before my final year of high school, the Painted Cave Fire consumed over 600 structures, including our family home. First lesson in impermanence. As I watch the destruction and suffering associated with the Palisades Fire in LA, I track those friends and family under mandatory evacuation, while still others spend sleepless nights with the flames …
Empathy First
I’ve been through some recent tumultuous events that made me more volatile around those I love, and in an attempt to learn new tools to manage that volatility, I’m a student all over again. Here’s a simple overview of pattern recognition skills I am trying to develop in order to ensure I get a handle on my reactions in moments …
Sympathy For The Sloth
On my morning bike ride, I pass a number of homes that like to go all out on the holiday decorations. Holiday decor never been my bag, although I have fond memories of making a paper mache spider one Halloween long ago with my daughter, and crafting a DIY piñata with a couple of toddlers certainly made for one of …
You’re Beautiful
The surgeon general declared that the US suffers from an epidemic of loneliness. Our society’s emphasis on self-sufficiency and rugged individualism certainly place us at risk for alienation. A growing body of literature has emerged suggesting that the connections that determine whether an individual feels isolated or enmeshed with their community comes not only from the deep social contacts, but …
Eye Contact
Long ago, I dated a woman with an unusual family custom. She and her family were privately nudists at home – parents and multiple siblings hung out together in the buff. While I don’t quite come from Puritan stock, it was a very foreign experience to hear her accounts of her upbringing (I never witnessed it, and can’t say if …
Aftermath
In junior high school, we were asked to investigate the topic of our choice and to provide both a written and an oral report for English class. At the time I was dating a cute 7th grade classmate whose parents were divorced, so I ambitiously selected the topic, “Children of Divorce.” I recall checking a not very good book from …